Everyone deserves a little sweetness.

Review: Strapless Bras for GG+ Cups- Elomi Smoothing Strapless

Posted on June 17, 2013 by Sweets

One of the perks of abruptly changing cup sizes over the last year has been the discovery that all of a sudden I can wear Elomi bras. Elomi’s recent collections have really upped their game in terms of style and fit, and their Autumn/Winter 2013 collection looks to be absolutely gorgeous. They were one of my favorite showings at Curve, despite the fact that I didn’t appropriately schedule my appointments and only really got to see them from the sidelines. When I was looking for a strapless bra to wear to a friend’s wedding this summer I reached out to the lovely Erica at A Sophisticated Pair for help, and she suggested trying the Smoothing Strapless bra by Elomi in my sister size (as it’s not available in my true size). Elomi will release a beautiful new strapless range in super-comfortable spacer fabric in August in a hugely expanded size range (as well as 32 bands in the basque, a first for Elomi!), but for the time being we had to fudge it a bit.

"Maria" basque and brief in black. Strapless bra and thong will also be available, and the whole collection will also launch in Ivory. Basque sizes 32 DD-HH, 34-40 D-HH, 42 D-H, 44 D-G, 46 D-F, 48 D-E (all cup sizes UK). Accessories M-4XL.

“Maria” basque and brief in Black. A strapless bra and thong will also be available, and the whole collection will also launch in Ivory. Basque sizes 32 DD-HH, 34-40 D-HH, 42 D-H, 44 D-G, 46 D-F, 48 D-E (all cup sizes UK). Accessories M-4XL.

I placed a special order for the “Smoothing” strapless bra in beige, and it arrived the week before the wedding.

36-42 D-GG, 44 DD-G, 46 DD-E, 48 DD. Molded bra, plunge bra, nursing bra, basque (black only) and seam-free bra also available, along with coordinating coordinating short.

“Smoothing” Underwired Foam Molded Strapless Bra by Elomi. 36-42 D-GG, 44 DD-G, 46 DD-E, 48 DD. Molded bra, plunge bra, nursing bra, basque (black only) and seam-free bra also available, along with coordinating coordinating short.

Construction: Like the Freya Deco “Shape” Strapless I reviewed earlier, it features smooth, molded cups and multiple points of attachment for the straps, so you can keep the straps hidden under different necklines and armholes. The straps are ever-so-slightly wider than those that came with the Deco, and they’re very soft with good stretch for comfort.

Appearance: Smoothing is very much a basic, functional piece of lingerie, and as such it’s nowhere near as pretty as the Deco Shape, which is intended to be bridal/special occasion wear. It’s by no means unattractive though: the lines are clean, it’s smooth and soft, the color isn’t too dingy, and there’s event a discreet, shining bow at the center gore.

Fit:

Unfortunately, as nice as it would have been to have a basic strapless bra, Smoothing felt much smaller in the cup than the Deco Shape. To some extent this has to do with something Freddy Zappe touched on at the Eveden fitting event at Curve (both Freya and Elomi are Eveden brands). Freya caters to the full-bust market, and Elomi to the full-figure full-bust market, and as such the patterns for each brand are designed for different builds and body types, even though there’s overlap in their size ranges. Deco Shape offers more projection in the cup, as well as feeling slightly more “structured” when worn: it offers very firm, very sturdy support. In spite of my moaning in my review about the hooks and not-at-all longline band, when I wore the Deco Shape under my dress for the wedding, that sucker STAYED PUT. I walked, I danced, I danced some more, I threw my hands up in the air like I just didn’t care, I carried buckets of flowers, I helped unscrew light bulbs at the end of the night, I hauled baking supplies home at 1:00 the following morning, and when I took my dress off and dropped it on the floor in exhaustion, my bra (and my boobs) were where I’d positioned them ten hours earlier.

Elomi’s bra, on the other hand, felt softer on the body, slightly more gentle. Whereas Deco Shape is a somewhat fearsome piece of engineering, Smoothing feels ever-so-slightly less sturdy. The band closes with three (you hear that Freya? THREE. not two) columns of four rows of hooks-and-eyes, and features silicon grippy strips at the top and bottom edges of the band, albeit thinner than those on the Deco Shape.

Of course as lovely as it is to have a bra that cradles you gently instead of hoisting you up, when it comes to a strapless bra I really need the latter. Another difference between the two bras I tried is that Smoothing’s cups are set further apart: the gore is wider, the wires are wider, and the cups themselves are more spread out and shallow. It’s simply built for someone with a slightly wider build, even though the band was a pretty good fit. My boobs are full, but they’re close-set with a lot of projection, and ultimately Deco Shape matched my, uh, shape, much better than Smoothing.

Here are two bras in the same size, same style (molded strapless), made by the same parent company, and yet they fit very differently. It was another good reminder not to get frustrated if you try a bra on in “your size” (or sister size, in this case), and don’t get a fit you love. The size on the tag is only part of the story. Try on as many bras as you need to to find a shape and fit that suit your style and your body.

“Smoothing” strapless bra by Elomi retails for $69 and is available at Nordstrom, Figleaves, Big Girls Bras, Classic Shapewear, and through A Sophisticated Pair.

Affinitas/Parfait Giveaway Winners

Posted on June 17, 2013 by Sweets

Congratulations to Erika and Amber, winners of the Affinitas and Parfait giveaway! Both winners have been contacted and have claimed their prizes. Stay tuned for another exciting giveaway coming soon!

Parfait, You’re Perfect: Parfait to Launch GG-K Cups

Posted on June 14, 2013 by Sweets

I’m so excited to share that Parfait (have you entered the giveaway? You have until midnight!) will offer expanded cup sizes beginning this August! This is such a delightful surprise, especially since the news I received at Curve in February was that expanded sizes were still a ways off. Parfait has really listened to customer praise and size requests, and will offer three very different styles up to a K-cup (UK), with the incredibly popular “Charlotte” style going down to a 28 back!

“Sophia” Wire Bra and High-Waist Brief by Parfait. Available in sizes 30-40 D-K (UK), in Beige and Pearl White.

“Charlotte” Padded Bra and Bikini by Parfait. Available in sizes 28-40 D-K (UK), in Wild Rose (pictured), Dusty Rose, Peach, and Red.

“Alexis” babydoll by Parfait. Available in sizes 30-40 D-K (UK), in Black and Ivory.

This news really thrills every fiber of my lingerie-obsessed being. Parfait is raising the bar among American lingerie companies to break out of the DD-DDD size cut-offs and catch up with their English and European competitors. Each style is a little different: you can choose padded, unpadded, or boudoir, and while the colors for the initial launch are a little basic, they’re merely the first steps in what I hope will be many more to come (and I love the new Wild Rose colorway for Charlotte: am I starting to overcome my anti-pink lingerie stance?). Finally, Parfait offers supportive, fashion-forward UK-sized full-bust lingerie for incredibly reasonable prices (bras are generally in the $40-55 range). Size-, style-, and budget-friendly: Parfait, you’re perfect. I can’t wait to try the new styles for myself; the only trouble is which to try first?

All expanded-size styles will officially launch in August of 2013. I’m not 100% sure yet which retailers will carry the line, but Erica of A Sophisticated Pair is already accepting pre-orders! She helped me order Julia Lambert’s “Danielle” set from Parfait and offers some of the best customer service around!

Happy Friday, indeed.

Sweet Nothing Du Jour: 6/13/13

Posted on June 13, 2013 by Sweets

To any idiot who says, “You a feminist? Do you burn your bras, then, huh? HUH? You burn your bras, you feminist,” you must reply calmly, “Fool. FOOL. Bra is my friend. My bosomest buddy. My inti-mate. Except for that balcony-cup Janet Reger one that was an inch too small and cut off the circulation to my head. Yeah. That one, I covered in gas and torched it outside the American embassy.”

How to Be a Woman
Caitlin Moran

Bra, thanks for being a friend.

P.S. Do you like bras? Would you like to win a free one? The Parfait/Affinitas Giveaway closes tomorrow at midnight!

Giveaway: Affinitas and Parfait

Posted on June 11, 2013 by Sweets

In addition to providing the set Julia Lambert reviewed yesterday, Affinitas has generously offered readers of Sweet Nothings the chance to win ONE OF TWO BEAUTIFUL PRIZES (!!):

1. One Serena set (convertible balconette bra (can be worn strapless!), hipster panty OR thong), in Pistachio by Affinitas, in sizes 30-38 A-DD, XS-XL

“Serena” convertible balconet bra and hipster panty by Affinitas. 30-38 A-DD, XS-XL.

2. One Madeline set (wire bra OR contour bra, high-waist brief OR bikini) in Black by Parfait, in sizes 30-40 D-G, XS-XXL.

"Madeline" high-waist bra (this image shows the contour bra; Julia Lambert reviewed the wire bra yesterday) in Black by Parfait. Bra 30-40 D-G, brief XS-XXL.

“Madeline” high-waist brief and bra (this image shows the contour bra; Julia Lambert reviewed the wire bra yesterday) in Black by Parfait. Bra 30-40 D-G, brief XS-XXL.

I am so thrilled about this, because it means a prize for my non-full-bust readers as well! All cup sizes are UK sizes (A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, FF, G).

To enter, please leave a comment on this post telling me about your dream lingerie set. Affinitas/Parfait offer some amazing options: bustiers, longline bras, babydolls, plunge bras, and a variety of fun accessories. What would you most like to see in your lingerie drawer? What colors do you think are missing? Are you a lace or a print or a colorblocking kind of person? I’d love to hear what your creativity can dream up! ALSO, AND THIS IS IMPORTANT: please tell me in your comment whether you’re entering the Affinitas giveaway, the Parfait giveaway, or both (as those of you who wear D and DD cups are able to). You can enter both giveaways, but you will only be able to claim one prize. The contest will close at 11:59 p.m. EST on Friday, June 14, 2013. I will contact the winners by email and announce the winners on Monday, June 17.

More fine print:

This giveaway is open to United States residents ONLY. I’m really sorry about this, but the good news is I have another giveaway in the works that will be open to my international readers. I hope to share it with you in the coming weeks!
ONE entry per giveaway per person. I will assign each comment a sequential number and use a random number generator to select the winners. Please be sure to log in with a valid email address, so that I can contact the winners. If I have not heard from the winner within 48 hours of the drawing, another winner will be selected.
Once the winners are announced, I will coordinate delivery of prizes with Rich PR. Please note: I am unfortunately unable to offer any returns or exchanges if something doesn’t fit well. If you haven’t tried these brands before, I really recommend seeking out a boutique near you where you can try bras on and find your best fit, so that you can feel confident that the size you request will fit you well.

GOOD LUCK!

Reviews: Pretties from Parfait, with Julia Lambert

Posted on June 10, 2013 by Sweets

I am delighted to welcome my lovely twin, Julia Lambert! I’ve done everything in my power to make her as obsessed with lingerie as I am, and the good news is, it’s working! She recently tried a new style by Parfait, and shortly thereafter Parfait reached out to me to offer another set for review, as well as a giveaway to a lucky reader! So it’s a Parfait-palooza here today. I’ll turn things over to Julia Lambert for her thoughts, and provide more details on the giveaway in tomorrow’s post.

Pretties from Parfait

[Disclaimer: Julia Lambert received one set as a gift, from me, the Best Twin Sister in the World, and Parfait generously provided the second set for review. All opinions are her own.]

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Hello, friends of Sweets! Julia Lambert here, to share and review two beautiful lingerie sets from Parfait by Affinitas. As a reminder, Parfait is the full-bust line (D-G) from Affinitas, one of the few full-bust lines from an American company that features stylish, youthful, and affordable bras. One set came as a gift from Sweets, and one set came from Parfait for review. I reviewed Parfait’s Charlotte bra previously, which has grown more comfortable and fit even better over time, and is definitely an all-time favorite. The other ladies in the dressing room for the last show I was in voted the Charlotte bra their favorite of all of my fancy delicates. I mean, it wasn’t an actual vote. That would have been weird. But the actress who played my mother did lean over and confide that she liked it!

I was able to put some of the fitting techniques, bra know-how, and general Sweets awesome-ness to very good use here, along with her help. I realized that, in spite of all my reading and excitement about lingerie and sizing, I still had questions when it came to trying new styles and fitting myself [as do we all- Editor]. Sweets’ input was invaluable.

The first set, Danielle, was a gift to me from Sweets [because I'm the best- Editor], purchased from A Sophisticated Pair with Erica’s assistance in sizing. It’s so pretty.

"Danielle" by Parfait. Longline bra available sizes 30-40 D-G (UK). Shortie available in sizes XS-XXL.

“Danielle” by Parfait. Longline bra available in sizes 30-40 D-G (UK). Shortie available in sizes XS-XXL. [I want this with a passion- Editor]

As with the Charlotte, we found that the best fit was a band size bigger and a cup size smaller than I’d wear in Freya or Cleo. Sweets also taught me some things about fit and cut. If you’re a fellow full busted lady, you might know that, on the hanger, full busted bras can look HUGE. This one is no exception. Mom saw the Danielle in my suitcase when I was visiting and thought there was no way it would fit me. Add a longline to it, and you’re looking at a lot of undergarment– Danielle features three columns of six rows of hooks and eyes. It’s also girly. Really girly. Blush satin, big white lace. On the hanger, it’s a big old pink thing that calls to mind Victorian dolls I totally would have lusted after as a child.

So purty.

The thing is, when it’s on…oh man. Banish the though of fussy faux-Victorian froof. It’s elegant, simple, flattering, and very feminine, but not at all mumsy. If you like the support of a firm band, this feels marvelous, but doesn’t pinch or compress. In addition, it’s beautifully and smartly built–Freya could take notes–so that the longline band doesn’t bunch or flip up around your ribcage. To match, I chose the shortie style knickers, and they are, as all Parfait knickers have been, incredibly comfortable and damn fine looking. The white covered buttons match the ones on the bra, and makes for quite the snappy outfit, even before putting on, you know, actual clothing.

“Madeline” wire bra and high-waist brief by Parfait. Bra available in sizes 30-40 D-G (UK), brief available in sizes XS-XXL.

The second Parfait set I tried, sent to Sweets for me to review, is the Madeline wire bra in black with the matching high waisted brief. I knew I liked Parfait’s padded bras, so I wanted a chance to try a non-molded, or “cut-and-sew” bra. In addition, this one just so happens to match my beautiful Jezebel longline knickers from Kiss Me Deadly, which, since their bras don’t fit me, and I’m a gal who likes her dainties to match, is the best.

Blue Dot Jezebel Longline Knicker by Kiss Me Deadly. I mean right?

The verdict: I love it, but it doesn’t fit right. But if you think I’m not going to alter it so it does, you’re silly.

Purty.

So, after many fittings with Sweets conducted via FaceTime (thanks, Apple, for your helpful products), we figured out why this bra isn’t the best fit for me. Like the Charlotte and the Danielle, the band (featuring three columns of two rows of hooks and eyes) and cups fit just like they’re supposed to! However, there just isn’t any lift. It feels like a bra that leaves me in the same position I’d be if I wasn’t wearing one, more or less. The reason? Strap placement. The straps are set quite wide, and, while I think they look nice and sit prettily on my shoulders and neckline, they’re not positioned to lift enough tissue to get the fullest support. If I move them a little closer to the center of the cup, away from my armpit–just 3/4″ or so–I’ll likely get the lift I need to make this a perfectly fitting bra.

I’m a person who generally finds that molded or slightly padded bras are the easiest to get a good fit in, while Sweets prefers cut-and-sew. The nice thing about Parfait is that, if you fit in their D-G range, you can find bras in both styles in most of their designs! The Madeline comes in both padded and non-padded, and they offer both padded and not padded longline bras. If you prefer a cut-and-sew cup, check out the Arabella longlines! Parfait’s designs are creative, their bras are well-made, and the prices are very reasonable ($40-$55, on average). I’m thrilled to have this pretty pink set for when I want to feel fancy, and the wonderful black and blue lace combination of my Madeline set and the Kiss Me Deadly longline knickers.

Mo is . . . uninterested.

I’m reading this unexpectedly, thrillingly fascinating book about perfume (Perfumes: the A-Z Guide by Luca Turin and Tania Sanchez), a subject about which I know very little. It’s oddly also about art, intellectual pursuits, and the sensory pleasures and richness of human life and experience. In the introduction, they write about perfume in a way that I think applies to so many other arts: music, theatre, painting, gardening, fine wine, cooking, dance, and others. Sanchez writes “The fact is that this stuff is worth loving. As with the tawdriest pop melody, there is base pleasure in perfume, in just about any perfume, even the cheapest and the most starved of ideas, that is better than no perfume at all. It decorates the day. It makes you feel as if the colors of the air have changed. It’s a substitute for having an orchestra follow you about playing the theme song of your choice…And it’s simply not true, as some people believe, that thinking about our pleasures ruins them. For example, few things are as wonderful as having a great meal and talking about it afterward, and remembering other great meals, and planning the next one…All pleasure is connected, and the endless ride we take between disappointment and satisfaction and back again is largely what keeps us interested in life. What more is there to talk about?”

For me, all pleasures are connected. The secret story that my lingerie tells: that I’m a fierce, powerful force and well-cared for creature underneath the polite and conscientious dress of an office employee. The feeling of nurturing and support I feel when I prepare and serve a good meal to friends, and we savor the pleasure of nice things together. The personal stories of dance that underlie my work in plays and films that lie centuries and lands away from the S Factor studio. Looking at paintings that recall walks in the woods and the heartache a mountain can give you. Books that remind you who you are, when you realize you’d forgotten. I think life is richer, deeper, more connected, and more joyful the more beauty, the more creativity, and the more passion we put into it. It sounds trivial, materialistic, consumerist, and frivolous, but you know what? Caring for my body and soul by putting the clothes I want to on my body, underneath the clothes I have to, is part of it.

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Sweets here! Man, Julia Lambert’s the best. Please check back tomorrow for details on how you can win a new lingerie set courtesy of Affinitas and Parfait!

And Then There Were None: Strapless Bras for G+ Cup Sizes (plus a review of Deco Shape)

Posted on May 30, 2013 by Sweets

I’m someone whose bra size shifts noticeably with even slight weight changes. For a while there I was up, down and all over the place, but over the last two years, as my band size has stabilized and breast tissue has migrated thanks to consistently well-fitting bras, my only size changes have been increases. I’ve watched, to my disappointment, as whole sections of the lingerie market disappear from my list of shopping possibilities. Adieu, Parfait. Claudette, we were ships passing in the night. Longline bras, I dream of what we might have had. As long as I was floating around the D-G size range, most full-bust brands made my size in a great variety of shapes and styles. With each cup size past a G, however, a new chunk of the market vanishes.

Let’s play a fun game: go to a major lingerie retailer and use the search-by-size feature with different cup sizes and see how many options are available. Here’s what Figleaves offers:

32G – 450 styles

32GG- 181 styles

32H- 177 styles

32HH- 112 styles

32JJ- 47 styles

To some extent these results are misleading; searches for “G” and “H” are also returning American G and H-cup bras, which are significantly smaller than their UK-counterparts. Figleaves also counts each different color of a particular bra as a different “style”, so the counts are a little inflated. Regardless, the difference between G and GG cup sizes is huge: a drop from 450 to 181. There’s another drop-off after GG, another after H, and yet another after J. This is why I get so excited when new styles, and especially new brands, launch up to an H-cup. Sure, our friends who wear J+ cups are still waiting (come on, Cleo, you gotta add JJ and K-cups, because you’re awesome), but it’s encouraging when a new brand aims high at the beginning, which hopefully bodes well for future expansion.

A search for “strapless” options on Figleaves makes the size cut-offs clear:

Strapless bra options for a 32 band: AA-H.

A woman who wears a 32 band has a few choices up to an H-cup (and only Panache’s “Evie” and Masquerade’s “Deity” are available in an H); beyond that there are no more options.

Curvy Kate will be launching their strapless bra for Spring/Summer 2014! I’m really excited to hear more, and as soon as I know anything (like, oh, a size range) I will report back!

To be fair, it’s important to recognize that H+ strapless bras are going to be more challenging to design and build, simply because they will be asked to do more work. Even though the band of the bra should be doing 80-90% of the work of supporting the bust, larger boobs mean that more weight (the 10-20% which would ordinarily be taken by the straps) is going to be “unaccounted for” in a strapless bra. Bravissimo experimented with their strapless bra up to a J-cup, which incorporates additional rows of hooks and soft boning in the cups for added support in fuller cup sizes, but it appears that they’re not planning to re-order this style, as sizes are selling out and staying sold out. I hope this just means they plan to redesign it and release a new style (maybe a strapless basque? please?!), but I’m not overly optimistic.

My dress! “Alika” by Bettie Page in Navy (I ordered mine through Modcloth). It’s AMAZING– super nipped-in at the waist, plenty of room through the boobs, and a skirt that flows gracefully out over my hips. While I could absolutely wear a regular bra with dark straps, I really wanted to make the pretty net yoke the star.

I’ve been incredibly frustrated trying to find a new strapless bra to wear with my dress (above) to some friends’ weddings. I tried Panache’s “Evie” basque, after seeing how beautifully it fit and supported my friend the bride (who wears a size in the D-G range), but even though this is available in my true size, the fit on me was a disaster. The cups seemed at least two sizes too small, the boning curled up on itself and rode up to rest at my waist, and it felt like the cups actually pulled my bustline downwards. I couldn’t return it fast enough, and then I began to seek out some options that I could “sister size” into.

"Deco" longline convertible bra and high-waist control brief in Ivory. Bra: 28 D-G, 30 D-GG, 32-36 B-GG, 38 B-G. Brief XS-2XL. Convertible plunge bra, molded strapless slip, short, and thong also available.

Eeesh, this picture turned out horribly– it’s much prettier in real life. Click the picture to see better images on Freya’s website. “Deco Shape” longline convertible bra and high-waist control brief in Ivory. Bra: 28 D-G, 30 D-GG, 32-36 B-GG, 38 B-G. Brief XS-2XL. Convertible plunge bra, molded strapless slip, short, and thong also available.

I’ve been really interested to try the Deco “Shape” longline convertible bra ever since it was first announced. The regular strapless Deco bra is fantastic, and I hoped the longline version would offer even more support. By pairing the longline bra with the high-waist shaping brief I wanted to get the smoothing shapewear properties of a basque or a body in a more comfortable and convenient two-piece package, and I love that I have a pretty, matching shapewear set instead of band-aid colored spandex. I found a good range of sizes in stock at Breakout Bras and placed my order, along with my new Panache bikini.

Appearance: the debut range of Deco shape comes in a pretty, smooth ivory with a pale pink floral pattern on the center panels. It would make great bridal lingerie, and yet here we are, at the end of May, and it’s been incredibly difficult to find in the U.S. Considering that brides are encouraged to have dress fittings weeks in advance, and that “wedding season” has been in full swing for a month now, this seems to be particularly poor planning on Freya’s part– the range should have been available in March at the latest. Anyway, I’m notoriously anti-white when it comes to my lingerie, and I still think this set is lovely.

Oh FREYA. You are so close. Side boning, sticky bands, and multiple points of strap adjustment? Check. A measly two sets of hooks? FAIL.

Construction: I’m super ambivalent about the design and construction of the bra. On one hand, the shape, support, and fit of the regular Deco strapless bra are all there. The cups are set very close together, a huge plus for my full and close-set boobs, and there are light side support panels inside each cup. The top of the band features a nice wide “grippy” strip, with a slightly narrower strip around the bottom of the band. Both band and cup feature two separate points on each side to attach straps, which allow for some flexibility with different necklines and top styles. There’s light vertical boning in the sides of the band for stability, and there are two columns of five rows of hooks-and-eyes. Five rows of hooks? Great! Only two columns of hooks? What gives, Freya? I’m actually kind of stunned. A brand-new bra that’s built to last should offer three columns of hooks-and-eyes, if not more, period. The band of a strapless bra, in particular, is doing more work, and there’s a chance that it will stretch out faster. Considering I’m in a slightly-too-big band size to begin with, I was pretty disappointed. That gripe aside, if I’d ordered a plain-old strapless bra, I’d be very pleased with this bra.

Well that’s . . . disappointing.

HOWEVER: this is not a longline bra. It’s not. The band extends below the underwire by a single inch.

Look, I am aware that there are some differences between a standard lingerie model’s body and my body; however, I feel pretty comfortable assuming they’re my height. I’m 5’10″, and as far as I know most commercial/mainstream models are around that height as well. So let’s look at Freya’s and Figleaves’ models, wearing my bra.

and

Call me crazy, but when I saw those bands on models who are around 5’10″, I imagined them being more in the neighborhood of three inches deep (below the underwire, that is), rather than a measly one inch. I wonder, looking at these pictures, if all of the bras, regardless of band/cup size, got the same band slapped on them. The same band on a D or E bra would in that case look significantly deeper than the band on a G or GG bra, which will have taller wires that take up more real estate. Don’t get me wrong, the bra still offers great support. It does not, however, offer the extra boost or extra smoothing properties of a true longline.

Speaking of smoothing:

Band, you are super, super wrinkly.

I’d heard that the bands on Freya’s “longlines” were prone to wrinkling and flipping up at the front. I figured, having a bit of a belly, I’d probably experience the same phenomenon. I was not expecting to see a band that puckered and flipped up even when no one was wearing it.

This is me, trying to take a picture looking straight down on the underside of the bra, whilst curving the band into the position it would hold when worn. The band is still flipping! My belly is not even there yet, bra, slow down.

Something is up with the band, clearly. It’s practically sticking straight out. It might be an issue that could be fixed with boning beneath the underwire (like in Parfait’s gorgeous longlines, which are both deeper and sturdier than Freya’s; review forthcoming), or with the addition of seams to help contour the band to lie more smoothly against the body. I’m fortunate in my short-waistedeness, for once, in that my high-rise briefs come up much higher on me than they do on the blonde model above, so I’ll be able to layer them over the bra band to help keep it in place. Otherwise I could see myself ducking away to adjust my bra constantly, and that’s no fun.

“Danielle” by Parfait, which features vertical boning directly beneath the cups to keep the longline band smooth and in place.

Fit: wrinkly annoyingness aside, the fit is lovely. I’m not getting a perfect tack at the center gore when I wear it strapless, but then again I’m in a sister size (I went one band size up and one cup size down from my usual Panache/Eveden size) and my boobs are heavy. When I wear it with the straps the fit is nearly spot-on. The Deco strapless doesn’t offer the dizzyingly plunge-y cleavage of the classic version, but in terms of shape, projection, support, and lift, I’ve yet to find a better strapless bra for the full-bust market.

I really, REALLY like the shaping briefs, and no matter what I decide to do about the bra, I’m definitely keeping the briefs. They’re a new product for Freya, and they’re great. There’s ruching along the vertical center back seam for contouring and shape, the legline is laser-cut in the rear to avoid panty lines, and the waistband is lined with the same silicon grippy bands that appear on the bra, to keep it from rolling down. They won’t cinch your waist in like a girdle or more vigorous shapewear would, but they definitely give a lovely, smooth shape under clingier outfits. I see myself getting a LOT of use out of these, and I can’t wait until Freya offers a darker colorway!

Verdict: It’s good. It’s definitely (very) good compared to what else is out there, which isn’t much, but I confess that I’d really hoped for more. Ideally I’d love to have the option of a convertible bra that’s a cross between this (alleged) longline and a full-length basque, with maybe six-to-eight rows of hooks and a sturdier band that truly acts as shapewear. Apart from Curvy Kate’s planned strapless bra for 2014, I don’t really see many new strapless options on the horizon for the GG+ market (correct me if I’m wrong though, because I’d love to hear about more). I have another strapless bra in a sister size on order from A Sophisticated Pair, so I’ll be really interested to compare the two when it arrives. I know Elomi plans to offer a beautiful strapless bridal range up to at least an H-cup this year, but it’s launching in August . . . just in time to miss summer/wedding season. Good call, Elomi.

Deco Shape is available at Figleaves, Breakout Bras, Leia Lingerie, and Bravissimo (plunge bra only).

[UPDATE: Amy reviewed the Deco Shape longline in a smaller size for Fussy Busty earlier this month.]

Have you tried a longline bra? Do you have a favorite brand or style? Am I justified in being disappointed, or am I asking too much?

Sweet Nothings Du Jour: 5/22/13 Bravissimo’s Summer Collection

Posted on May 22, 2013 by Sweets

Well, well, well. Bravissimo just released some of their new summer styles, and I don’t want to say that they designed them JUST for me, or anything, but really, let’s look at the evidence:

“Boudoir Beau” in Ivory/Raspberry. 28 E-J, 30-38 DD-K

I’ve been asking for a new colorway of Boudoir Beau ever since I fell in love with the green version, and here’s a sweet Raspberry.

“Candy Bliss”. 28 DD-J, 30-38 DD-K.

A pretty new style with a delicate floral print and sheer/polka dot panels.

“Sweet Bon Bon”. 28-38 DD-J.

Notice a theme yet? Also, [insert customary approval of all things polka-dotted].

“Cherry Fling”. 28 E-J, 30-38 DD-K.

THIS IS BASICALLY MY FAVORITE EVER.

It seems like SOMEONE wants Sweets to buy all the dessert-themed bras ever and pair them with recipes. I see what you’re doing, Bravissimo. I’m onto you. I will not be seduced by your wily tricks.

Except I totally will. Cherry bra, you will be mine.

In all seriousness, I’m increasingly impressed with the quality and creativity of Bravissimo’s own lingerie designs. All of their new-season styles include G+ sizes, and several include J+. Alana is available up to an L cup in a pretty new Aqua shade, Sweet Bon Bon is ~~(I think) their first~~ (as Astrid reminds me below, their second) half-cup up to a J-cup, and the popular Rococo Charm bra has returned in a bright, summery coral. I am a little surprised to see how few options there are for 28 backs over a J cup: Bravissimo only carries two styles, and both are by Panache. I know that demand for 28JJs and 28Ks is probably significantly lower than other sizes, but it would be nice for women who wear those sizes to have options besides white, beige, and black, even if it’s just one option. That concern aside, the summer collection reflects a good balance of styles: half cups, balconettes, and plunges, bright, cheerful colors, and whimsical prints, as well as bra-sized camisole and halter tops in an array of colors, now up to H cups (although still no 28 backs).

Both Bravissimo and Pepperberry seem to really shine when their collections reflect a cohesive theme (as Pepperberry’s 2012 Autumn 1940s-influenced collection did). If the theme of Bravissimo’s Spring release was florals, the theme for Summer is most definitely sweetness. I know it’s not everyone’s cup of tea, but while I wouldn’t want my entire lingerie drawer crammed full of pink and frills, I’m already dreaming of raspberry ice creams, cherry pies, pink meringues, lemon cookies …

****

Bravissimo’s full summer collection, including styles from other full-bust brands like Panache, Cleo, and Freya, is available here.

Us Beautiful People

Posted on May 17, 2013 by Sweets

The fabulous Bras and Body Image shared this lovely post on Facebook this week:

Obviously I love this. I kind of squealed in delight.

I am also being 100% serious when I say that this simple, cheerful, polite, utterly badass response to common, run-of-the-mill trolling kind of rocked my world. Last week I was having some anxiety/icky-feeling flare-ups, and was sitting weepily at my desk thinking “whyyyy am I such a mess?”, and then Friday I got my period, and I swear every month I’m all “what is wrong with me I’M A MONSTER— Oh.” Like at age 28 it’s a surprise. ANYHOO. The point is, I have been struggling to love my body lately.

Not when I’m out doing things, mind you. When I’m walking around or doing my thing in my pole dancing classes or messing with the cats or cooking or what have you, I feel grand about my body! I love feeling tired and sore after a dance class, and sleeping the sleep of the physically fit. I love having the energy to run around the city. It’s when I look in a mirror or try on clothes and see myself through the lens of models and magazines and diet ads and other people’s eyes that I falter. I don’t think I’ve ever once looked in a mirror and said “Yeah! Right on.” Never. I have been self-conscious about my weight since I was five or six years old. I look back at pictures of myself as a child and think “ahhhhhh you scrawny little moppet with dimply cheeks you are perfect!”, and I look back at pictures of myself in college and think “well, your hairstyles certainly had quite a time, but you yourself are Fine!”, but I truly can’t remember a time when I looked at myself in the present moment and thought that I, as a whole, looked good.

The incredible Gabi Fresh, modeling one of her designs.

I mean, lots of us have seen this gorgeous woman, right? This is Gabi Fresh, and I look at her in her bikini, and all I can think is “You look freaking amazing.” Her body is no better nor worse than a “mainstream” swimsuit model’s; she just looks like her, an absolutely awesome version of her, in a fantastic bikini.

I wonder sometimes why, if I think that Gabi, or a more “mainstream” model, or my girlfriends, or strangers at the beach look great in their bikinis, I can’t extend the same thumbs up to myself. I think it’s easy to get sucked into a “yes, but” mentality about ourselves. Sometimes it’s rooted in a natural desire for self-improvement, personal growth, and other aspirations. “Yes, I totally nailed that pole trick! But now I want more! For my next challenge, I will work on doing it on my non-dominant side, or from the air instead of the floor.” Or “Yes, I totally just ran three miles, but next I want to run a 10k!” Goals and challenges can be fun and stimulating, so we say “yes, I did that, but now, I’ll do this.” Unfortunately that can easily become “Yes, my hair looks great today, but my face is being dumb,” or “Yes, my boobs look fabulous in this bra, but my belly is puffy and annoying.”

I don’t think I’d ever considered the possibility that my beauty wasn’t constantly in danger of disappearing. I have always had the mindset of looking for a specific point at which I’d be perfect, or finally be beautiful, or finally be attractive or alluring to someone I loved. What if I gained five pounds? I better hurry to fix it. What if I lost five pounds? I better try to lose more. What if, by some miracle, I got pretty, and then lost the pretty and never got it back?

I ordered a bikini this summer (the one above, by Panache*), because my bra size has changed since last year and I want a swimsuit that fits properly and feels good to wear at my friend’s bachelorette weekend in June. It arrived this week, and with the triumphant images of Gabi, Georgina, my gorgeous friends,and other awesome women in mind, I opened the box and tried it on. And then I crashed. I mean, really, just utterly crashed and burned. Every terrible thing I’ve ever been told or thought about my body just came roaring out: your boobs are too big to wear a bikini! Put them away! You have too much back fat! You’re too short-waisted to wear a high-waisted bikini bottom! Your middle’s too thick and your hips are too narrow! You look inappropriate! You’re too pale! You’re too wobbly! You’re not toned! You’re too tall and you’ll attract too much attention! You’re too flashy in those bright colors! You should wear something more discreet! P.S. Your hair is also stupid!

GOD, BRAIN, SHUT UP.

I aspire to the (seemingly) effortless self-confidence and self-love of someone like Ianthe, and the grace with which she schooled her anonymous troll. Comments like “you’d be so pretty if you lost weight” are designed to destabilize, to hurt, to make the recipient shrink back, to tell her to disappear, to discount her. They’re designed to reinforce the idea that a woman is only worth as much as her beauty, which is in turn solely dependent on her weight. I talk a lot about beauty coming in many different forms because I genuinely believe that it does. I believe because I have seen it. I have tangible proof: in movies and magazines, yes, but also in my friends, my co-workers, the women in my dance classes, in my family, in women I’ve met through writing the blog. Really, just knock-your-socks-off beauty: it’s there, and it manifests so differently and magnificently in every woman. I talk about it over and over and over again in the hope that I can re-route the thought patterns that years of judgment and criticism have carved deeply into my brain. What I know to be true about others, though, I still struggle to apply to myself. I accept any criticisms or negative feedback as absolute God’s-honest-truth, yet hear compliments and assume the giver is lying to “be nice”. Which is ultimately hugely disrespectful to the giver, but never mind.

So yeah, when I saw myself in my bikini, I got mad at my body first, and then I got mad at my brain, for not walking the walk when my goal in life is to talk the talk as hard as I can. Why couldn’t I tap into the same self-love Ianthe, Georgina, Gabi, and others have shared so beautifully before me? Why DIDN’T I feel like life sure is a breeze?

I don’t have a good answer, except to give myself the space and the time to keep working on it. The same thing happened the last time I put on a bikini, and I’m sure it will happen again before all is said and done. The dark and cranky pathways in our brains have years and years and years of nasty thoughts and words crowding out the good stuff, and it will take time before the healthier, more reasonable, and more loving thoughts are strong enough to stand their ground. I thought about returning the bikini and looking for something more “discreet” and “appropriate”, but I’m going to keep it, if only to have as my next personal challenge. I’m going to wear it. I’m sure I will feel self-conscious, and I’m sure there will be some nasty thoughts that pipe up, but if I want to be one of “us beautiful people”, I want to wear something fun and bright, and I want to learn to enjoy it.

* * * * *

*Quick review: dang, this bikini top rules. The fit is PERFECT, 100% true-to-size, and majorly comfy and supportive. My only minor quibble is that based on the promo images I thought the straps and band would be a bit wider, in keeping with the retro look, when in reality they’re both quite thin. I don’t mind this in a bra, but I do think it would be both more comfortable (bigger boobs can be heavier boobs) and more flattering to have a bikini top with wider straps and a deeper band that didn’t dig in as much. The colors are fantastically flattering to my pale skin/dark hair, I love the sweetheart neckline, and the briefs are very comfy as well. They’re maybe a teensy bit big through the hips and rear, but I wouldn’t want to size down, because I don’t want a lot of digging at the waist. They come up REALLY high on me, as I’m short-waisted, so they’ll keep the retro look very nicely on longer-waisted women too. I ordered mine from Breakout Bras, which has a lovely selection of bras, maternity needs, and swimwear, and which offers fit advice on every product page, as well as free (and fast– ordered Sunday night, arrived Wednesday) shipping and fantastic service. Both bikini and store get a big thumbs-up from me!

The Fab Fit Academy with Ali Cudby

Posted on May 10, 2013 by Sweets

If Ali Cudby’s name sounds familiar, it’s because I’ve fangirled her a few times before. Namely here, when I reviewed her book (Busted! The FabFoundations Guide to Bras that Fit, Flatter and Feel Fantastic) shortly after starting Sweet Nothings and basically loved the hell out of it, and then here, when I met her at Curve and she had on awesome stockings and we talked about Bravissimo. I was absolutely thrilled when she announced the launch of The Fab Fit Academy, and I didn’t have to think too hard before signing up as a charter member. After writing Sweet Nothings for a year, I know now more than ever that I want to work in the lingerie industry in some capacity for the foreseeable future. I love writing my blog, and I love the things I’ve learned and the people I’ve met, but eventually I’m going to want to do more, and part of the more will involve bra fitting.

I’ve read A LOT about bra fitting in the last six years, and Ali’s approach is the one rings truest. As lovely as it would be, there simply is no single method, no one system, no perfect “algorithm” (who can’t let it go? Is it me?) that will spit out the perfect bra size for each and every woman. It would be swell if buying a bra was as easy as buying a t-shirt, but it’s not that simple, because bodies aren’t that simple. If my identical twin sister and I, who share something like 99.89 percent of our genetic makeup, wear different sizes and generally prefer different kinds of bras, the likelihood that we’re all supposed to wear 34C padded t-shirt bras is pretty low. Size guides, calculators, and fitting charts will only ever be more-or-less helpful guides; it’s usually impossible to know exactly how a bra will fit and feel until you try it on. This is why it’s so important to focus on FIT, not on SIZE. We may all in fact wear a few different sizes depending on different brands and styles, and unless we know good bra fit criteria, it can be hard to know where to start.

For someone who cares passionately about helping women find bras they love that make them feel wonderful, Fab Fit Academy is the answer to a prayer.

It’s a very exciting time in the lingerie industry: there have never been more brands offering beautiful, supportive bras and lingerie in a vast range of sizes. It’s great for me as a blogger, because I want to see All the New Things! and stay on top of all the new developments, and it’s great for customers, who have never had more options, but with so much conflicting, out-of-date fit advice and inconsistent sizing from brand to brand and country to country, it can be bewildering and overwhelming for many women to figure out what brands, styles, and sizes will feel the best and suit their lifestyles.

The Fab Fit Academy will change that. Offering bra fitters, boutique owners, and bra educators an enormously comprehensive overview of bra sizes, bra styles, bra fitting fundamentals and more advanced topics like breast anatomy and age or lifestyle-related breast changes, FFA reinforces the concept that size doesn’t matter; it’s fit that’s most important. Students get immediate hands-on experience, putting each lesson into practice in the fitting room as quickly as possible and returning to the class with any questions or feedback. From a lingerie industry novice to women who are great at fitting themselves but have never worked with others, the experience is invaluable.

In FFA, Ali outlines the B.U.S.T.E.D formula, inspired by her book:

Begin with your Band
Understand your Underwire
Smooth your Cups
Tack your Gore
Ease your Straps
Determine your Shape

I know I said above that there wasn’t a “magic formula”, and it’s true: the B.U.S.T.E.D. formula doesn’t really let you punch in numbers so it can spit out a bra size. However, understanding each component of the formula not only clarified and refined my understanding of fit, but it’s also helping me break out of my size-oriented approach to things. I have a really hard time coping with any personal size fluctuations. For a variety of fun and awesome reasons (need sarcasm font), I sometimes fall into the trap of attaching an enormous amount of weight and judgment to my clothing and bra sizes, and if something in “my size” doesn’t fit me well, it can really shake my body confidence. FFA gently helps us break apart the components of good fit to show that there’s way, way more going on than just band + cup, and that the size on the tag isn’t nearly as important as the bra on the woman.

That psychological and emotional response to bra fitting is one of the most important topics Ali covers. Students will leave each class with an enhanced understanding of the emotional aspects of bra fitting, and they will have tools to help the women they fit who may struggle with body image, self-perception, and insecurities. Some women may be confident in their bodies and bra sizes and therefore averse to trying new things. Others may have insecure or vulnerable feelings about their breasts, their bras, and their bodies. You never know what sort of negative past experiences have shaped a woman’s view of herself, and Ali teaches, by instruction and by example, how to be sensitive to and understanding of a client’s physical and emotional state, and how to use your knowledge to help her find not only a good fit, but also how to boost her .

Ultimately, by offering comprehensive, consistent training, Fab Fit Academy will solve my number one disappointment with in-boutique fitting and shopping experiences: inconsistency. Many women have experienced wonderful, life-changing service at a boutique, only to return for a second visit and receive indifferent or even poor service. Boutiques and local businesses who follow the Fab Fit curriculum will be equipped to offer the kind of service that engenders happiness, loyalty, and praise in their customers. In an age where savvy shoppers can find whatever they want online, FFA gives brick-and-mortar boutiques a tremendous advantage over their web-based counterparts.

Is the Fab Fit Academy for you? Well, obviously I think it’s for everyone who may, one day, find themselves in the position of helping clients with their bras: lingerie (and wedding!) boutique owners, fitters, clothing designers, and perhaps especially stylists (think of the gift you could give your clients, by showing up armed with some amazing bra know-how). If I had to give you any advice before signing up, it’s to make sure you allow yourself some time. Homework involves both written and hands-on assignments, and they are time-consuming, especially for those of us who aren’t currently employed in the lingerie industry (classes assume you have access to a certain number of “customers” every week, and after a while I felt like I was running out of friends to pester). I’ve scheduled and rescheduled appointments, traveled to stores, spent hours in the fitting room, sent follow-up emails, researched, researched, researched, and that’s all before tackling the written assignments. My “real” job has been very demanding so far this year, and I have Project Wedding Cake and Sweet Nothings and lots of other commitments in the rotation right now, and I realize now that I dove into FFA headfirst without really making a plan and budgeting my time. So . . . yeah, you guys, I’m still turning in my homework. Fifteen-year-old me is horrified.

I would love, one day, to walk into a NYC lingerie boutique and see a little “Fab Fit Academy Certified” badge of honor in the window. As a customer, it would give me the comfort of knowing that the store and its employees care about their customers’ fit and well-being as much as their sales (and of course ultimately helping your customer is one of the best ways to make a sale– see Erica and her amazing work with A Sophisticated Pair). I’m also so glad I (will, once I finish my homework) have my certification as I begin to figure out how I want to build my career, because that certification means that I have completed a certain number of hours, have specific expertise, and have been evaluated by a third party as Knowing My Stuff. Sure, I knew a lot about bra fitting from the many excellent resources available on the internet. I could fit myself pretty well. But I now feel confident about going out into the world and helping any woman who might come to me for a fitting. I may not have all the answers for every situation, because of course you learn more over time, but I would know how to find the answers, how to ask questions, and how to treat my client with dignity, support, and respect. My tremendous thanks to Ali for making such a fantastic resource available to us all.

Registration is now open for the second session of the Fab Fit Academy.

Everyone deserves a little sweetness.

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